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| 100, audio nonfiction, blowjobs, public, fetish, gob, hollinger international, cuckold interracial, nursing, director, art hedberg, | Like taking a bath, or shopping. “I’ve been thinking capsules I’ve never taken you on a proper date,” capsules says Chad. “There’s this little Italian place I know around the corner. Papa John’s. Would you do me capsules the honors?” I am 10 pounds heavier than when I arrived at college. I have started wearing sweatpants as a kind of uniform. For the past two weeks, I haven’t even bothered with makeup. I can’t imagine what Chad likes about me, what he sees in me. Though I’m not exactly attracted to him, it feels awfully nice to be wanted, to be taken care of. And while I always thought the man I dated in college would be sophisticated, and handsome, and mature, practically the polar opposite of Chad, maybe I was being too unrealistic. Maybe I just need to lower my expectations. Maybe I just— At that moment, my mom calls. |
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| He takes blowjobs my hand. His palms are sweaty. “I hope that’s not something you regret.” “Oh, no, not at all,” I say. “It was just sort of unexpected.” “Yeah, it was fast. I apologize about that.” “You don’t need to blowjobs apologize.” I make a gesture that requires taking my hand back. “The other night was fun.” “It was? I mean, it was fun for me. I’m blowjobs glad to hear it was fun for you, too.” “Fun” is not exactly the right word. The actual act of sex has never been much fun for me, never been much more than a lot of heavy breathing and thrusting, a kind of horizontal aerobics. And though all the parrying and the undressing and the kissing that proceeds it is fun—at least, it was with him, because it was all so sudden and exciting—I always find myself somewhere in the middle of sex, kind of wishing I were somewhere else. |
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